A blog by Bill Hess

Running Dog Publications

Support Logbook
Search
Index - by category
Blog Index
The journal that this archive was targeting has been deleted. Please update your configuration.
Navigation
Friday
Apr272012

Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha

 

 

 

 

The drive by large van from the K. Ganesh home, where we were hosted, to the house of the groom's parents took somewhere between half-an-hour and 45 minutes. The bride used the time to apply her makeup and finish her beauty routine. By the time we arrived, Sujitha looked... well, see for yourself... stunning and gracefully beautiful! Now it was time to enter the home of Manoj's parents - the household that she was about to become a member of.

Along with a host of relatives who had come up from Bangalore and an uncle who had come from Wasilla, Sujitha was greeted at the gate of Manoj's father and mother, Mahadev Bimanna and Jayshree Biradar with a blessing.

As lunch is being prepared, Sujitha sits with her cousins, Aishu Visnu and Brindha Padmanabhan, in the upstairs living room.

 

 

 

 

 

 

There is time to visit and socialize. Sujitha returns to the lower level and then poses in the doorway to the Biradar home with Manoj. Above the doorway is a representation of the deity Ganesha, Remover of Obstacles, Lord of Beginnings. The doorway frame is decorated by the same forehead symbol that identifies members of the Lingayat faith.

Back inside, Sujitha visits with her close friend and former coworker in Bangalore, Ganesh Arumugham. In the aftermath of tragedy, Ganesh was her confident and comforter at work. Ganesh plans to marry in October. In the background, Sujitha's brother Ganesh talks with cousin Aishu.

As her father and brother-in-law to be pass by, Sujitha receives a hug from Aishu.

 

 

 

 

 

Sujitha and Soundarya - "Soundu" - had often spoke of the good times they would share together at the wedding of Suji and Manoj. Soundu is not here, but the unfinished tribute to her and Anil tattooed onto the bride's arm continually reminds us of her and in spirit brings her to us.

As requested, Suji puts her henna wedding art on display.

Not long after I took this photograph, Aishu and I were visiting and she asked me how I felt about India. I told her that I love India, and that I regreted that I had not come here earlier in life so that I could have came back more often, could have seen and learned more.

"But then we wouldn't have been part of your India," she responded. No, I argued, I could still have met them at my niece Khena's wedding - even after I had already gotten to know India and they would still have been part of my India. Since then, I have thought more about it. I think Aishu was right. If I had gotten to know India when I was younger, everything would have turned out differently. My relationship with the country would have been different. It would not have happened the same at all.

Aishu and her extended family are not only part of my India - THEY ARE my India.

I am glad now that I did not come earlier. I would not have wanted India any other way.

Soon, lunch was served.

As always seems to be the case in an Indian home, it was excellent. And don't let this fool you. The servings kept coming and coming. I ate in abundance.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After lunch, there was a bangle function for Sujitha.

Suji receives instruction of the way of the Lingayat when it comes to wearing bangles.

Sujitha and Aishu.*

After the bangle function, Sujitha and Bhanu spent time meeting in turn with and socializing with different women family members and friends of the Biradar's.

There is a sacred necklace and locket Sujitha will be expected to wear from now on, although most of the time it will hang on the inside of her clothing and will not be seen. The Brahmin also wear a necklace to serve the same basic purpose, but it is made of gold and is different in design and make. She shows her Lingayat-style necklace and locket to cousin Bharathi Kalyan and mother Bhanu.

The earliest, pre-temple shrines in Hindu culture date back thousands of years and are built on a design called Lynga, said to symbolize the male and female union, in both the physical and spiritual sense. The Lynga is contained within the silver locket. A Rudraksh seed also serves as a prayer bead.

In the late afternoon - early evening, Sujitha's father Ravi will perform a lead role in a Puja function called Kalasha. In the meantime, lunch has left just about everybody feeling sleepy so they nap on the floor. Sujitha uses her dad as a pillow.

Ravi, performing the Puja of the Kalasha, along with Chandu Bagale, maternal uncle to Manoj.

 

 

 

 

Again, my knowledge is too limited for me to attempt to go into any detail, but the coconut, mango leaves and water in the post are considered to be a symbol of abundance and the source of life, to contain the elixir of life. The Puja Kalasha is considered to be auspicious, a prayer ceremony to request all the things it represents to be plentiful in the couple's life.

Priest Mallayswami conducts the puja. A videographer with a strong light also documents the event. I should note that this videographer was very polite and friendly and eager to help me out. He did not speak English, so we could not speak directly, but if he was not shooting and he saw me shooting into what he deemed to be too dark of a space, he would turn on his light just for me.

I didn't always want the light - sometimes, I just wanted the glow of a lamp, or the softer light natural to the room, but he made such an effort to assist me that I could not help but appreciate it and so just accepted it. I have decided that the strong, hot, glaring video light has become a natural part of Indian weddings and is just one more element for me to work with, rather than to rail against.

Ravi holds the plate with burning lamps.

Ravi wears the type of hat worn by the men in this part of India.

Participants are blessed and purified in the smoke.

Manoj is blessed.

Sujitha was blessed in the same manner. I photographed it, but I like this shot a few seconds later better.

The couple prays.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chandu Bagale feeds Ravi either sugar or something made of sugar.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ravi returns the treat.

Sujitha stands with Manoj and the family about to become her own.

 

*April 28: There is special significance to the ring on Suji's little finger that I was unaware of when I posted this. She explains in comments.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Thursday
Apr262012

Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What does she look back upon, Manoj's grandmother Shivamma, who lives in Bijapur, a remote village that still lacks many of the conviences of the modern world, including running water and sewer? I met her in the home of Manoj's parents, Mahadev Bimanna and Jayshree Biradar. How does she fit the new and changing India into the one that formed her?

And just what does she dream, this young girl whom I found sleeping within the walls of the same house? How will the new India unfold before her? And how will the India of old fit into it?

These questions, by the way, apply not only in India, but wherever the reader might be, too.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Wednesday
Apr252012

Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding

 

 

 

 

 

 

During a function that will mark the final night before the wedding that the bride stays in the home that houses her birth family, Bhanu prays for her daughter. If the family lived here in Pune, this function would be taking place in their home. As they, and I, are staying in the home of the family of their relative Krishnamurthy Ganesh the function takes place in his house.

Without someone like Manoj and Suji here to guide me, I will not attempt to describe the religious significance of all that is happening. Manoj's family is Lingayat, a religion within Hinduism founded in the 12th century by a Basavavanna, who had been Brahmin but wanted to abolish the caste system and so formed Lingayatism.

Sujitha is Brahmin by birth and upbringing but will now be considered Lingayat. Not so long ago, a Brahmin and a Lingayat could not have married, but now they can.

The priest, Mallayaswamy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sowmya Ganesh assists Sujitha after she applies the forehead markings that identify the Lingayat.

Sowmya then turns to Manoj and his forehead markings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sujitha and Manoj.

Priest Mallayaswamy blesses the couple whose wedding he will soon preside over.

Afterward, Bhanu is once again overcome with the same emotions she experienced when the train reached Pune. As family members gather around to give her comfort and support, she hugs her one surviving daughter. 

Now, Manoj and Sujitha will receive blessings from everyone in the house, beginning with the mother of K. Ganesh, Janaki Krishnamurthy who is bedridden.

Sujitha returns the blessing with her touch of compassion and love.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The couple then kneels before grandfather Natarajan to receive his blessings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They receive the blessings of Sujitha's hosts, the Ganesh's. And yes, once again, I gave the couple my blessings in the way of their own custom and tradition. Once again, it felt good, as though I were blessed myself - which I was: blessed to be there for this sacred and special event.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blessings from the parents of the bride.

Afterward, everyone seemed to be happy, feeling good. Up to this point, all present, except the priest, had been relatives of the bride.

Then two of Manu's male cousins, Prashant and Jayantm arrived. Sujitha then served coffee to the priest and the male members of the family she is marrying into and had a cup herself.

Afterwards, she gathered the empty cups.

Then... dinner, south Indian style, prepared by Sowmya with a little help from her guests - and yes, once again, the dining was superb. Aishu Visnu, Sujitha's cousin, cultural sister, and close friend from Bangalore, expressed her fondness for Sujitha by feeding her.

Manu had returned to the home of his parents. His cousins had left also. Now, Sujitha joined her family and relatives for a final night of socializing before the wedding. Aditya, youngest son of the Ganesh's pulled out his guitar and began to strum and sing.

Suji got her turn and made everybody laugh. Everyone tried to get me to play, but I wouldn't do it. Once, I was fairly good on the classic guitar, but that was long ago. I haven't played in decades. The fellow on the right is Abhishek, who is studying to become a pilot in the Indian Air Force. His father is retired from the Air Force and now runs a business supplying aircraft parts to the Air Force.

Perhaps you have noticed the tambura in a few of the pictures that I took back in Bangalore in the home of Ravi and Bhanu. It belongs to Bhanu. She seldom plays it now, but on this night she was persuaded to play the guitar. She held it as though it were a tambura.

Somehow, even though she was out of practice and hestitant in her performance, when she played, she touched me deeply.

As Bhanu played, Aishu painted the toenails of the bride.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aishu also painted Sujitha's fingernails.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Wednesday
Apr252012

Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Before I jump straight into wedding related functions, I decided I need to quickly reintroduce the groom first. So here he is, Manoj Biradar, at a men's clothing store in Pune, checking the fit of the suit he will wear to his wedding.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here am I, with the bride and groom and Natarajan, in the suit Sujitha bought for me so I could attend her wedding in good style. Don't worry about the long sleeves. It will be tailored to fit me just right.

 

 

 

Series index:

India series, part 1: With a little help from the Indian Air Force, I begin my India series without actually beginning it
Return to India, Part 2: Pain beneath the fan, a sprawling tree, monkey on a string; those I would soon join on a train ride; the garland
Return to India, Part 3: My Facebook friend, Ramz, her mischievous brother, her nationally recognized achiever mom, her dad at the wheel
India series, Part 4: When you overtake an elephant on the highway, be sure to pass on the right; birthday remembrance; In Wasilla, pass "oversize" on the left
Return to India, Part 5: I wander the cold, empty, streets of Bangalore
Return to India, Part 6: A cow, blessed and safe; Suji takes me to lunch, then goes out with Bhanu to do some wedding shopping
Return to India, Part 7-A: A three-snack outing as mother and daughter shop for Suji's wedding
Return to India, Part 7-B: On the painted holiday of the final full moon of winter, Sujitha and Kruthika go back to get a necklace
A spacer only - the Buddha and the glamour poster ad
Return to India, Part 8: henna, to highlight her beauty and deepen the love between bride and groom; a moment on the way to the train
Return to India, Part 9: A prayer and a blessing for Suji; we head for the train; three calls to Manu
Time for another spacer - the green man who showed up at the railroad station
Return to India, Part 10: The train to Pune, part 2: Sujitha by the window as a thin thread of her India flows by
Return to India, Part 11: On the train, part 3: Ganesh Ravi - Photographer: how we discovered his hidden talent
Return to India, Part 12: On the train, part 4: After dark
Return to India, Part 13: train ride, part 5: we click and clatter into Pune, take a perilous walk and step into a world beyond imagination
Return to India, Part 14: The groom his wedding suit; me in mine
Return to India, Part 15: A function to mark the final night Sujitha would spend with her family before the wedding
Return to India, Part 16: Inside the Biradar house: portrait of an elder woman - portrait of a young girl
Return to India, Part 17: We dine in the home of the groom's parents, then join in the Puja of Kalasha
Return to India, Part 18: Slideshow: Sujitha and Manoj at the wedding hall - Engagement and Haldi Night
Return to India, Part 19: The wedding band, in the visual style of Sgt. Pepper's (10 image slide show)
Return to India, Part 20: The groom rides a white horse to the temple, there is dancing in the street; Sujitha and Manoj are wed
Return to India, Part 21 - Benediction: Sujitha takes me to the sacred waters; fish dine - a crow flies
Tuesday
Apr242012

I break away from my India coverage just long enough to go meet Margie, Lavina and Lynxton and spend a few brief moments with my family

On my way to Ted Stevens International Airport in Anchorage, I found myself behind this fellow on Fifth Avenue. It was one of those situations when I sorely wanted to remove the dirty, cracked, windshield in front of me so I could take a crystal-clear picture. But sometimes, you either get the shot through a dirty, cracked, windshield or you don't get it at all.

I was on my way to meet Margie, Lavina and Lynxton when they got off the final flight bringing them home from Phoenix.

I had wanted to meet them as they came out from the secure area, but I didn't make it in time. Jacob, Kalib and Jobe did, though.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And here they are, all of them getting off the elevator near the baggage claim area.

And here came Melanie, who had just arrived home from Kuparak on the Arctic Slope, very near to Prudhoe Bay. Lynxton was overjoyed to see her.

"How does the cool air feel?" I asked Margie. On their last day in the Phoenix area, the temperature had reached 107 degrees (42 C).

"Good!" she answered.

"How does the warm air feel feel?" I asked Melanie. During her stay at Kuparuk, temperatures had ranged from -25 (-32 C) to a warm 10 (-12 C) at the end.

"Good!" she answered.

Here, the temperature was about 50 (10 C) - just about as pleasant as it could be.

The youngest boy: Lynxton, in his Aunt Melanie's arms.

The second youngest boy: Jobe, in the arms of his mother, whom he has not seen for a week.

The oldest boy: Kalib, in no one's arms, walking about on his own two feet.

Lavina had brought Margie to Phoenix with her so that she could babysit Lynxton while Lavina attended her workshop. Now that they were home, Margie would need to spend the rest of the week, at least through Thursday, babysitting the boys in Anchorage.

So the plan was for me to drive home and spend the rest of the week alone, just as I had the previous week, and the week before that, etc.

But instead, I brought Margie home, then got up early in this morning and drove her back to town. Then I drove back alone.

Tomorrow, I will return this blog to India. Some very neat things happened between the time we got off the train in Pune and the wedding functions began, but I really need to get Sujitha and Manoj married, so I will jump ahead, straight into wedding related functions.